Underachieving Children by Richard L. Ward |
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Underachievers are good, bright kids who appear to be just plain lazy. They let deadlines
pass and claim they forgot when the work was due. They can pay attention to video
games and television, but they lack motivation when it comes to things that are important
like school.
Underachievers lack five characteristics of successful people. They fail to start
work in a timely manner. They fail to apply persistent effort until tasks are
completed. They fail to turn in work on time and meet deadlines. They fail to work
without constant supervision. Finally, they fail to demonstrate initiative.
The key thing that underachievers need to develop is motivation. Counseling which
develops motivation improves performance in subjects like math and science and English
without ever discussing those subjects.
There are four things that underachievers do not respond well to. They are:
First: Coaching from parents or a tutor. Students with high IQ scores and high
achievement test scores don’t need tutoring, they need motivation.
Second: Repeatedly explaining the value of an education to persuade the student to
apply more effort.
Third: Offering large bribes. This can generate a lot of initial enthusiasm, but it usually
wears off quickly and grades can even get worse.
Fourth: Grounding or punishing the child. There may be an initial improvement but there
is no long term change. Again, grades may be even worse after a while.
The first step in helping an underachiever is identifying which type of motivational
problem the child is having. The four types of underachievers are: security seekers,
recognition seekers, dependence seekers, and identity seekers. Each type of
underachiever is experiencing a different type of motivational problem.
Security seekers are manipulative and try to be in control. They are often focused on
what is going on around them instead of what the teacher is saying.
Recognition seekers will make A’s on some papers and F’s on others. There is an all
or nothing pattern. A recognition seeker will refuse to apply effort if a teacher doesn’t
appear to like him.
Dependence seekers present an indifferent attitude. They deny responsibility for their
grades and explain why teachers caused them to fail.
Identity seekers are in a power struggle with authority figures.
Dependence seekers are the largest group. They have habitually blamed others for their
problems and they believe they are the helpless victims of bad teachers and bad luck. A
special counseling technique called unhooking projections is effective in correcting this,
although it might have to be done hundreds of times. If an underachiever says that his
mother doesn't understand him, thereby projecting blame onto the mother, I unhook the
projection by saying “So it is hard for you to communicate things to your mother.”
Counseling requires months or even several years of treatment, depending upon the
duration and the severity of the underachieving behaviors.
I teach parents to force underachievers to start evaluating their own performance. When
your child shows you a paper, don’t give your child your own evaluation of the grade.
Simply say “How do you feel about that?” Even if the child seems to evade the challenge
to evaluate his own work, say something like “How you feel about your work is very
important.” Then the child will start the process of thinking about what his standards
really are.
New Test Identifies Underachievement in Children and Teenagers
1. Teachers say he or she could do better but just doesn't try.
2. He or she spends more time avoiding homework than doing it.
3. He or she blames everyone and everything for his or her poor grades,
but never accepts personal responsibility.
4. Even if an assignment is done it may not get turned in.
5. He or she cannot accept constructive criticism and may become angry
or out of control when corrected.
6. Most homework assignments, chores and even self-initiated projects
are left unfinished.
7. Although excellent work can be produced with close supervision,
he or she fails to work independently.
8. He or she will only work in classes in which he or she likes the
teacher's personality.
9. He or she delays doing things when asked and puts off doing homework
and major projects until the last minute.
10. He or she claims to have forgotten the assignments and chores that were given.
Five or more “Yes” answers to these screening questions indicate problems which could
require professional assessment or counseling. Children with these problems are often
underachieving children who are experiencing problems in motivational development.
Counseling may help.
Call: Richard L. Ward, LPC, LMFT
Acorn Christian Counseling
For a Free Consultation, call 361-937-8711 for an appointment, contact us here.